Could you tell me the difference between these socks?

Yes, I need some assistance buying a pair of socks, and I've got a good hour to spend contemplating which socks I should purchase, so where shall we start?

And then there’s the heart surgeon guy, a man who can take your heart out of your chest, place it on your belly and put it all back together again, but cannot comprehend the workings of and is downright dumbfounded by a trunk mounted car rack. Yesterday, the heart doctor guy, who we lovingly refer to as the penis guy, (more on that later), and who I will henceforth refer to as Dr. Penis, came back in after I thought he had finally left, to inform me that the instructions for the rack were not included in the box. Again, here is a highly educated man, who understands the vastly complex functions of the human body as well as the universe of medicine, but who cannot conceive that perhaps the instructions could have slid to the bottom of the box, below the rack, and therefore out of view. You should have seen the astonished look on his face when I reached down in there are produced the instruction packet. I might as well have pulled out a little bunny he was so bowled over. And then he asked, for at least the fifth time, “Is this rack difficult to install?” “You’re a doctor,” I said, “You’ll be fine.”